How about dating a widower
That leads you to question his “I love you” in word or deed? Step away from the high school cafeteria table where you once giggled and obsessed about boys. You were learning about the whole relationship boy/girl exchange, but as an adult woman, the only thing you are ever going to get from it is a big fat bruised ego. Insinuating himself into your life and your affections. Show me a “sex accident” and I will recant, but until I am offered proof, I will maintain my disbelief.
If it’s not too soon to have regular “sleep over” dates than it is not too soon to ask questions when you feel that love is in the air and he, for reasons unclear, doesn’t seem to be feeling it too. It’s no different from the divorced guy whose “wife screwed him over” or the never married guy who’s “afraid of commitment because of that girl who dumped him once … The stereotypical guy whose been too hurt to open his heart again routine has rewarded many a man with the cake sans having to bake it for himself. He will not retreat or play “now you see/hear from me and now you don’t” games.
In addition to letting the widower initiate the date request, you should also set a slow pace for the relationship, both physically and emotionally.
A man who is truly interested will be fine with taking things slowly, while a man looking for a rebound relationship will be less eager to do so.
He says he has always taken it slow in dating and this is nothing new.
I want to be sure that I am getting my needs met and that I’m not just a “rebound” for him. Dear Karen, One thing I know about widowers, followed by two things I know about men.
And he will have taken steps – in the words of Captain Picard – to “make it so”.
It was during the time of this anniversary that he retreated.
We got back together a few months later for another eight months, but now the same thing has happened at the same time of the year.” “Do you think these are issues about his wife and that even after such a long time he is still not ready to move on or perhaps his problems stem from other issues?
Beginning a new relationship with a man who has lost his wife might seem overwhelming, as it can present a fresh set of dating challenges and questions of proper etiquette.
However, as with any relationship, patience and kindness are often the answers to overcoming many of the hurdles, such as upset children and unresolved grief, that come with dating a widower.